Today has been a great day—for one thing, I’ve got more tone back in my voice, it hurts less to speak, and swallowing is finally just annoying vs. annihilating. Ahhhhhhh. Thanks God.
But I’m still learning. Know what the most humbling part of this whole process has been? Realizing that most of what comes out of my mouth isn’t as necessary as I thought. And in may cases, not necessary at all.
I’m a born talker. I love to tell stories, to communicate, to share what’s on my heart. Hence this blog. But when every word strains my vocal chords, I only speak when absolutely necessary. As it turns out, that’s far less often than I thought. Not only that, but even when I do speak, people only hear me about half the time because of other noise. So the “contribution from Brad-o-meter” is registering about 5% of it’s usual capacity…
And wonder of wonders, the world is still spinning on its axis. My kids are still alive. Shauna hasn’t made any family-killing blunders. The church is still functioning without my sermon last week. The stock market hasn’t crashed.
Huh.
I’ll tell you what DOES occur to a guy in my position, coming to these realizations. You start to wonder whether YOU are needed. Sitting at a table while conversation goes on all around you, not being able to contribute, realizing they’re getting along just fine without you, is humbling. But as I prayed about it, God showed me that I am not my words. I am needed. Just being there is something people need. My kids need a daddy more than they need a daddy talking. Shauna needs a husband even more than she needs a talkative one. Right?
Even so, I’m reminded of Jesus’ words when he said, “I say whatever the Father has taught me to say, and how to say it.” He only spoke words that mattered, every time, all the time. Wow. What if I made that my goal too?