Something important was resolved in my life today.

The moment closure came, my knees wobbled and an emotional shudder shook me. A sense of utter fragility blanketed my soul and all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry and rest. The weariness I’d been sucking in so hard came loose like a belly fighting an unforgiving belt line.

Which was strange, because I’d been praying about this thing and thought I’d been trusting my Daddy’s heart for the future. What my reaction proved, prayers or not, is how much of this issue I’d been trying to carry. The relief and release I felt signaled the weight I’d been trying to shoulder myself. If I have to unclench my fists, it means I’m holding onto something.

Father, may I trust you more completely, may your peace release my clenching, my striving, my futile wondering and worrying. Thank you for your grace, that this brokenness is beautiful to you because it’s offered in worship.

I love you.