It strikes me that it’s impossible to get a direct look at your own heart.
“Know thyself,” the old adage goes, but only God sees what’s really there, deep within.
We can only see vague reflections of it in the world around us.
I catch a glimpse of my heart by looking at my friends,
When I ponder which movies I love, and why.
I catch a glimpse of my heart in Shauna, the woman I chose to love ’till death do us part.
I catch a glimpse of my heart in my children, who are somehow totally themselves while increasingly resembling their parents.
I catch a glimpse of my heart when I look at how I spend my money,
When I cry, and in what I cry about.
I catch a glimpse of my heart when I laugh, and in what I laugh about.
I catch a glimpse of my heart in my work ethic,
In the prayers I pray when I’m in crisis.
I catch a glimpse of my heart in the prayers I pray when I’m enjoying life.
And in the battles I choose to fight.
Sometimes people describe my heart to me, but human words can be clumsy, vague, and misleading things.
Best of all, I catch a glimpse of my heart in the word of God, when I see myself in its unyielding mirror.
And I catch glimpses of my heart in Jesus, who is transforming my heart to look like his.
Blood. Guts. Glory.
My heart in a thousand mirrors…
… and I can only see one at a time.
Yikes, wish you still allowed an anon posting – it’s just that the longer I live, the more I see that my heart is desperately wicked- Jesus, kill my ” flesh”…. Right now, living as a hermit seems so appealing … No one to disappoint etc.