This morning I got up before everyone else, stealing through he silence as I slipped out the door to take a drive through a peach sunrise. As the fog of sleep (vs. the fog of war) lifted, I was gripped again (or still?) with the mission God has given me:

Live the life. Cast the vision. Preach the word. Lead the change.

I typed that moniker up last year, taped it on my desk front and center. Break down my job, and that’s what it comes down to. As I pray, I sense clearly that last year, I dropped the ball on two, maybe three of those. And while every believer stands before God accountable for their own lives, I also know that as the Lead Pastor, I’m saddled with a weight Paul the Apostle spoke of — with some angst, at that (II Cor.11:28). I’m accountable to lead. To be faithful to the vision God has given me. Period (Acts 26:19).

Even before I became Lead Pastor, the Spirit of God and I had a couple of pretty intense conversations about the role I would soon be called into. One of the things he said was that I had no business charging into this valley unless I was willing to die there. To give myself entirely to the cause. I’m sensing that reminder again: It’s time to bring it. To be the vision-bearer, to spend myself, to pour myself out, to express a fiery zeal for God’s household, to give 140% in order to wring %70 out of the people I lead.

Which makes me take a long, careful breath. This is going to hurt. This is going to cost me.

But this is worth it. So be it, Lord Jesus. Thank-you that you are the ultimate Shepherd of your people, that I’m just another sheep on the most basic level. That while what I just wrote is true, in another sense it isn’t up to me at all. I trust you and I love you, and I intend to prove it. I welcome your presence, wait for your word, cling to your touch.