Be still my heart. My Christmas gift has arrived: Quantum stealth camouflage material.

Okay, I probably won’t get Quantum anything for Christmas.

But get this: According to this article, “The U.S. military is backing the development of camouflage fabrics that could one day make their soldiers completely invisible.”

Where can I buy this invisibility stuff? Seriously.

Check this out: “Its makers claim the material, which is in effect similar to the invisibility cloak worn by Harry Potter, can even fool night-vision goggles.”

Quantum Stealth Camouflage? I’ll take four. Because I’m getting picked up by night vision goggles all the time.

Here’s another pic.

No, that’s not a girl cut in half. It’s my Christmas present in action. Write this down: Quantum Stealth Camouflage, Brad Huebert, Christmas.

The possible civilian uses are pretty much endless:

1. You could actually become a fly on the wall and listen in to what people are saying about you.
2. You could creep across a field in public just for fun.
3. When you want some down time during a board meeting you could just melt into the background.
4. You could jump out and scare people. Every single day. Young, old, everyone. All the time.
5. You could stand in front of a movie screen without people yelling, “Down in front.”
6. You could throw the cloak over a mess on the floor you don’t want to clean up.
7. You could perform magic tricks that would render David Blaine insane with jealousy.
8. You could toss a big one over your car to avoid paying for parking downtown.

Stop salivating. I found it first. You can have your Quantum Stealth Camouflage after I order mine.

My question is, what would you use this stealth technology for? Get creative, and share your ideas below!